You know, I have to say I really didn't enjoy my weekend, and I'm glad to be back to work. It has taken my mind off of the Julia issues. At least a little bit. My performance wasn't all that bad today. Room for improvement, of course. But I'll never know everything and be perfect at this job. Especially with less than a year under my belt.
FTO and I discussed Julia today. I don't know why I find it easier to confide in him. But, he talked to me about it and what he thinks I should do. We discussed possible drugs she could be on. I don't believe it's just marijuana... He suspects meth, since she has lost weight and hasn't slept in 8 days (according to her). I have to agree it has to be an upper drug she's taking. Marijuana won't prevent you from sleeping. We also discussed how it was a good decision for me to separate myself from her. He was saying how she and I both have chosen our own pathways, and unfortunately they're opposite paths. He then started saying that when she hits rock bottom, she'll call out for help, and when she does, I need to help her. He advised not to give her money, any of that. He said to give her real help. Like help her leave this guy, help her see a psychologist. All those things.
You know, I hate to say this but... I find myself drawn to my current FTO. He's attractive (he's probably about 5'11", hazel *green blue* eyes, brown hair, deep, low voice). He's 35 years old. Southern accent. He's flirty. Makes me laugh. I don't know. I don't know why I'm starting to feel this way. I really don't want to. If any of you all who read this have any suggestions on how to avoid this attraction I would love to know. This attraction doesn't prevent me from doing my job. I still work with him on a professional level. I just feel it and honestly it's bothersome... Maybe it's because I'm in a car with him for 8 hours every day... But, at the same time, I never felt this way with any of my other trainers...
Oh and a side note. I discovered FTO got a facebook... He claims he got the facebook account a couple months ago to check up on his cousin. I know that's not true. I've searched him before and his account just popped up yesterday. Also, one day we were talking in the car and facebook got mentioned and he didn't even know what it was, until I told him I had one. I wonder why he really got a facebook account...
Anyway, it's late and I should probably head off to bed. I have some cleanin to do tomorrow! Woohoo.
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5 comments:
good to hear you had a good night. you've always been attracted to older men (hello vincent!!)
yeah but i dont WANNA be attracted to him... :P
I hope you are having a much better week!!!
Continue to be the consumate professional as you have been. Try hard not to think about him. Will you work with him in the future? Hopefully not so you can give yourself some space.
i'll end up working with him every now and then in the future, but not like it has been now. we won't be riding in the car together. he just might back me up on a call or whatever... so, hopefully after this the feelings will just fade...
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